if you're bored of chee's antics,turn to palin's wayang.

so there are a few more weeks till the big Ass.i wonder how i'll do for math eventually.but i'll keep my spirits up and pray.gp and history have been okay.

it is yet time for compartmentalization.but its slightly different this time.but oh well.i must not let my own insecure and emotional conjecture get the better of me.thats what the rest of the boys tell me and thats what i'll attempt to do.

cheers for brighter days and nights ahead :)

whoa freak he's damn smart

life seldom turns out the way you intended it to.you make all the plans in the earnest and raw desire to actualize some of those childhood ambitions,only to find that they are,well,an exclusive and elusive domain.and it is always amusing when we look back at years gone by and realize how crazily silly or asinine our fears/wishes/hopes were when we were younger.now im pretty sure a few years from now,i'll look back and be amused at many of my rantings here too.like how i am by those made when i was in vs.but i think the vague essence of despair pops in every once in a while.and that,even with time,does not really change.

in fact,i think the older you get,the more delusional you get.hearing some of sis's outlook about life and the world worries me a bit sometimes.of course i only speak of vicarious knowledge since im just a college kid struggling with,what,A levels?but late nights reflections and a couple of poignant sms with zai just open the floodgates.oh well.tomorrow will be a better day and we should all learn to take it one day at a time.rushing ahead into the elusive and prospective future or retreating backwards to the romanticized,proverbial good old days will only leave us the poorer for it.at least thats how i feel at this specific point in time.im at liberty to adjust or alter my point of view,though.im only a college kid :)

that is why we love spending time with kids and/or simple people sometimes.mind you,"simple" is not a euphemism in any sense!!im serious,sometimes dont u feel that with kids,you are completely released from this burdensome existence sometimes?you see a little bit of yourself in them.that part which you have lost to time and the process called growing up.thats pretty sad so we should try to retain a little bit of our childhood idealism and careless behavior!this frequent belief probably explains why i sometimes insist on being spontaneously ridiculous.life is too short,even for an eighteen year old.yes.

in more superficial news,i think catholic junior college and saint joseph's institution are da bombz.real cool worzzxx!!STYLISH NAVIES FOR THE WIN!!!magic number: AGE 20! go go go figure.

and below is a pictorial illustration of yesterday's open house comm dinner at taka.thanks lizzy and zhiying for organizing!err i think i ate about 500 prawns.NICE.well i couldnt upload another pictorial illustration of my study date with honey bear before the dinner at atas forum cos its in my phone and somehow i havent learnt how to properly transfer stuff from my darling motorola to the comp.i'll learn in time and share my joyz with you soon.for now,goodnight and goodluck!

the mighty

To laugh is to risk appearing a fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.
To reach out for another is to risk involvement.
To expose feelings is to risk rejection.
To place your dreams before a crowd is to risk ridicule.
To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To go forward in the face of overwhelming odds is to risk failure.

But a person who risks nothing,
Does nothing.
Has nothing.
Is nothing.

He may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or love.
Chained by his certitudes,
He has forfeited his freedom to live.

i think my body clock is very perverse.but i kinda like being up and awake at hours like these cause its nice to feel like everyone else is asleep and you're existing and experiencing this world and realm of human existence individually,alone and locked up in my room.and yes,the preceding sentence was just euphemism for being a social recluse,and a happy one at it.quite demented thinking,but i sort of feel that when everyone else is asleep,no one is there to interrupt my reflection mode or jostle for imaginative space with me.a bit like how carrie bradshaw in her sober moments in satc.

the abstract aside,i've had quite a good day today.surprise party for jerlyn went well!thumbs up to kehui for pulling it all together :) happy birthday,jer.you're 18.i strongly believe that ten years later when she thinks back about tonight,she'll be damn amused at the highs and lows of being a teenager!inevitablities of growing up make the journey more colorful and meaningful :) i shall stop talking in codes now haha.it was a good night,for a good purpose,with good company and food!

since coming home i've been putting in piecemeal efforts at my h3.err in fact,i just finished watching "28 weeks later" not long ago cos sis was watching it and i thought the plot,though rudely and fatally imaginative,was quite refreshing.but nevermind!thou shalt not despair.i shall aspire to finish it up before going for open house comm dinner in town tmr.sigh sigh.i've one more thing i wanna do before school opens and that is to swim!have always procrastinated.time to get down to business and the pool.

yesterday after camping at marine parade library till it closed,i went over to yapheng's.wad a house visit man.one thing i learnt,boy oh boy,countless things lurk beyond the surface i swear.and after sitting by the bus stop and talking to ah heng,my contentment level went up.family,whether you love it or loathe it,is a central part of who we are.inextricably linked to how we become who we will become.for those who loathe one's alloted family,God bless you,me and America.lol again im speaking in codes.ZOMG.

right i shall really make the most of the coming days,recharge,relax,reflect and get ready for the mugging grinding all over again.it is the proverbial last lap ahead and im not gonna let up!i cant actually,considering how uninspiring the prelims went.overnight mug sessions,i lub!

before i go to sleep and to my sweet dreamland,once again: HAPPY 18TH,JERLYN :))

prelims are over :)

im at bryan's now with zai who is sleeping beside me :)

massage at dubious parlor in bishan heartland with auyong daryl and bryan was super amusing and shiok :)

surprise at vj for calwink :)

lying on the bed having the talks of our teenaged-angsty lives :)

i love this temporary life baby!!

if you're also temporarily free like me,go watch the videos about the iraq surge congress report involving the two man holding the banner for the war proudly,but quite some delusion?enjoy.

somebody express these sentiments with regards to singapore's palin,please!

today is my idol's 85th birthday :) the only thing tainting the celebratory mood is the onslaught of math.i am getting fearful.

but here's something for singapore to be collectively fearful about: the day the clowns in the video below inch anywhere near the seat of power.this is not a reflex action of frown upon opposition or dissent of any kind.it is selective frowning,reserved for the exclusive group called the singapore desperate party.i quite enjoy the writings on places like yawningbread and toc.but thrash from sdp,really,is in a league of their own.



okay goodbye im going to sleep now and time for marlow's psychological journey into self and nick's observant look at the anguish beneath the the frivolity and superficiality of the Uncle Sam's Dream later on.

SINGAPORE IS EVOLVING,INDEED.
I WANT TO BE ON YOUTUBE 24/7.
IT EDUCATES YOU MORE THAN NORMAL OR BINOMIAL DISTRIBUTION :(

ngiam first showed me this quite some time back.and i remembered how FREAKING amused i was when i watched them.and just now while washing up after dinner,somehow sis and i started talking about local films.and this one,inevitably,sprang into the conversation.and i got FREAKING excited again and so i went to youtube and watched it again.it still gave me the FREAKING feeling which makes it one of my FAVORITE short films ever :)

apart from the above happy recount,today has been a frustrating day of math.back to the grill after this short royston respite!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sometimes dont you wish you could tell someone in despair that things will just be okay,or that it'll all be over real soon?it sucks feeling helpless when someone comes to you with a situation you feel for but you cant change right?

im not even talking about some emo shitz,pls.im freaking talking about PRELIMS :(

and you cant tell your friends it doesnt matter because you jolly well know how freaking important this is.and it is sad that the realization didnt come earlier or in time for some salvaging efforts to surface.and now we're almost halfway through and im feeling sian.

not so much by studying since i havent been doing much of that.it is more of another realization having its effects felt and sinking in:a levels are gonna bang bang happen,than it'll all come to an end.i mean the year,jc life,all the comforts and familiarities which came with being in this bishan bubble.

the feeling is pretty different from leaving vs.back then the fear was that being in different jcs,we'll slowly drift apart and stuff.it was the first major departure or shakeup to my immediate environment since puberty for goodness sake so naturally many unfounded fears took root too.but haha thank God nearly two years on we're still as tight.true la one or two have drifted away.but i guess you also take such phase in your life to know who are those that really will stick with you and stick through time.and even though sometimes i get all emo and insecure about stuff,i know its all good deep down :) and haha quite selfishly,i think sometimes,in my more perverse moments,i secretly think it is a blessing in disguise that some things happened the way they did.

but as i was saying,this time,the prospective departure is giving me a differing set of emotions.okay maybe they are still very premature since its still early september after all.i guess partly cause after the first departure some fears or thoughts have already been taken care of and that other larger considerations are lurking around now.like,post-formal/uniform school education life.which is really a pretty big shift if you think about it.but everyone seems to make that switch and everyone seems okay.either that,or everyone has just shut up about it.

whatever the case,the point is,beyond this juncture larger considerations which did not loom large in kids' lives before are present.and lets not forget donning the greens in tekong.again that is supposedly a big shift but no one seems to be making much noise after enlistment.again,either every body is having so much fun or that people have grown up and stopped talking.

and on top of all this,im super excited,probably a tad apprehensive too,about the whole going overseas enterprise.i wonder how is it like to have many friends going overseas and no longer being within meeting-up-for-coffee distance.

i guess with each new chapter in one's life you learn and see new things,which,only time can tell and teach.attempts,like this,at projecting and postulating about the future almost always end up with a cold and harsh jolt back into reality.and the reality in which we are currently living in is unfortunately and unmistakably academic.

p.s: goodluck for chem,gab and any other utterly unprepared soul.god bless :)

p.p.s: HAPPY BIRTHDAY SETH KOH XI LIANG.even though you didnt reply zai and i.you're still very much loved and always be our baby.zomg i miss him leh!!!!!!

yes yes,i didnt know i had a soft spot for such teenage punk rock songs too :) lol tastes change with time eh.in fact,everything changes with time.okay goodbye boyz.hang in there,jc kids who are having prelims.we'll get there in time i hope.





anyway i suddenly thought of listening to sporty spice so haha here goes.okay bye bye now.

if there's any laudable contribution the opposition can legitimately claim credit for,it certainly cant be anything else but that they are pure sources of amusement.so i thought i'll share my source of entertainment with you guys.

in other news,prelims start tomorrow.i am scared and sian.THIS LIFE SUCKS.but it'll be over in time,and better in time :) yes.

bill maher is super duper interesting.hahahaha distractions abound at home.sigh sigh.okay gotta make up for lost time now!!!!!!!!